THE SYNOPSIS John Tucker (Metcalfe) is the most popular guy at school. Head jock, super stud—you name it, he is it. Meet his 3 girlfriends: Heather (Ashanti), Beth (Bush) and Carrie (Kebbel). They’re all pretty, and sweet—and totally ignorant of each other’s dating status to one John Tucker. When they do find out, all 3 break-up with him. But revenge is a dish best served cold. So they girls concoct a scheme to get back at him. Enter new girl, Kate (Snow)—a nebbish, but brainy girl with hidden beauty underneath. Heather, Beth & Carrie make Kate over so that she may entice John. She does, and he’s smitten. But through the revenge plot, Kate falls for him. Ironically, she also has a liking for his sweet younger brother, Scott (Badgely)—and he for her (secretly, at least). Will the girls get their revenge? Will Kate end up with the right Tucker. Is there a moral? Go see for yourself! THE CRITIQUE JOHN TUCKER MUST DIE is another teen movie that aims for raunchiness buts ends up being entangled in its own PG-13 net. Amusing in some instances, yet totally inane in others--it dawned on me that the screenwriter, Jeff Lowell (a TV scribe), hasn’t a clue about how real teens act. You wanna see how real teens act? Watch Larry Clark’s disturbing KIDS (1995) and get back to me. Just a thought! The cast is adequate, with leading man Jesse Metcalfe setting the tone. The ladies in the cast are very sexy--so watching them wasn’t a problem. I wish we had pretty girls like that in high school. My school’s modeling shows were sponsored by ALPO! Anyway, moving over to the other side of the camera, JTMD does have some comedic pedigree to its credit. Helmed by actress-turned-director Betty Thomas (I-Spy/Private Parts/The Brady Bunch Movie), the movie does have some comedic flair (yet comes nowhere near the style of something like 2004’s The Girl Next Door--which was a loose remake of one of the classic teen comedies, 1983’s Risky Business). The movie also exhibits some nice, cheery lensing--courtesy of veteran English cinematographer Anthony B. Richmond (Employee Of The Month/Candyman/Don’t Look Now). I do have to give it that. Other tech credits (editing, production design, score, etc.) are fine. By the way: the entire production was shot in lovely Vancouver, Canada. THE BOTTOM LINE Cute trailer, dumb movie. At least the cast is attractive. I can freely leer at the ladies since they are all over 18 (besides, nobody in these teen movies are actually teens). But I did laugh a few times, if that’s worth anything... CAST: Jesse Metcalfe, Brittany Snow, Ashanti, Sophia Bush, Arielle Kebbel, Penn Badgley, Jenny McCarthy CREDITS: Director: Betty Thomas; Screenwriter: Jeff Lowell; Producers: Bob Cooper & Michael Birnbaum; Director of Photography: Anthony B. Richmond; Production Designer: Marcia Hinds; Costume Designer: Alexandra Welker; Editor: Matt Friedman; Music: Richard Gibbs AC/AL/MV 2006 89m ENGLISH